The Toxic, Negative Destruction Taken on Children of Narcissists

Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi has a great podcast about Narcissistic Personality Disorder and how to heal from dealing or living with a narcissist. In one episode titled, “Childhood Origins of Those Who Live in the Shadows of the High Level Narcissist,” she talks about the negative destruction taken on children of narcissists:

Children of narcissists become experts at catering to the idiosyncratic needs of the narcissistic parent/s. In other instances, those who end up in the shadows are raised by neglectful, emotionally absent parents. When kids have been treated without affection & care, they have a very difficult time creating intimate attachments when they are older. Beneath the psychological wounding, lie feelings of helplessness, depression & rage. These negative emotions are hidden because the psychological pain that they reek is unbearable. Often the child who has felt unloved desperately seeks out satisfaction by turning to a person who promises to satisfy his/her needs for attention & validation.

Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi

Children of narcissistic parents generally experience shame and grow up having poor self-esteem. Oftentimes, these children become adults that are high achievers, self-saboteurs, or both.

Children hurt by a narcissistic parent will need professional help to recover from narcissistic abuse.

If you are looking for valuable insight and healing strategies after living in a destructive psychological relationship with a narcissistic parent/s, there’s a time when you recognize that you must separate from the narcissist and move along your pathway of restoration, transformation, and spiritual practice the way you define.

This can be a difficult decision to get to. Talking with a licensed counselor can help you sort out your feelings about your experience, and also help you construct your next steps on how to start healing.

If you feel that this resonates with you, contact the Holistic Counseling Center of Long Island for more information about counseling near you.